No way to win?
I just read an interesting story on new research on parenting dynamics.  http://www.livescience.com/culture/super-moms-parenting-100318.html
My executive summary: When mothers feel that their partners are very competent caregivers, the more time that the partner cares for the children the less self-confident the mother feels.  If  the mother judges the partner to be incompetent, their evaluations of themselves do not change regardless of the time that the partner spends taking on these tasks.
So much of our social construction of a "good" mother still involves caring for the children, the home, and the spouse all of the time, regardless of other obligations, working status, etc..  So while mothers today may want to or need to have partners who actively take on these duties, when they actually do - and do it well- these women may feel less confident and secure in their own abilities and worth. 
A lovely catch 22.  As a friend observed when I shared this with her, the bizarre conclusion is that the "best" (ha!) scenario here would be to have a partner who reallly, really tries to help out a lot but does a crappy job of it.  Fabulous. 

I should be working but....am... not...
(because of course you could not tell that by the fact that I am on my blog)
Just spent most of the evening cleaning up surprise bodily fluids, none of which belonged to me.  After five days of happiness, Noella went back to the stomach bug with a bang.  When I picked her up from daycare, the teacher handed her over very tentatively, like you would pass a bucket of something that you REALLY don't want to spill.  She said that Noella had just had a bad diaper, and it leaked, and maybe she should not come tomorrow.  When I finally had the privilege of opening the bag of yucky clothes up after the girls were in bed, it was quite a treat.  The pants actually looked as though she had not even been wearing a diaper at all, they were so covered in poop. It had run down her legs and SOAKED INTO HER SOCKS.  I have dealt with a lot of yuckiness over the years, but these were my first poop soaked socks.  Always room for new experiences in the world of parenthood, right? 
After that I got to turn to shampooing the carpets, as there have been multiple dog pee incidents in the past two days.  Hudson had to be put on steroids for an ear infection that was pretty out of control, and one of the side effects is being extra hungry and thirsty.  Which leads to a need for extra potty breaks.  Which does not work when you have two people gone at work.  We are in the tapering down phase of the steroids, so I am hoping this won't be an ongoing issue.  And, Patrick and I will get to split the day tomorrow to be home with Noella, so the dogs should get plenty of chances to go out!
And now I will go back to work....

Two thoughts from our weekend. 

Our new book (thanks Barbara!) to read together.  Mariel is both fascinated and confused.  After two days, we are already on Chapter 5.  I think that this may inspire a whole new world of imaginary play and daydreaming.  Personally, I am finding the book a very odd read (or perhaps "curiouser and curiouser")- as with many things, it seems very different than how I remembered.

And:
Mariel's baby that she put down for a nap.  Why?  Where do you keep your babies?

I forgot....
She had her yearly check up today and is 41 inches (75th %) and 37 lbs (66%).  Growing quite nicely- and no shots this visit! 
The pediatrician and I also talked about some of our issues with her dramatics and moodiness and he assures me that this is something normal, we are dealing with it in an appropriate way, and she will grow out of it.... eventually... he is pretty sure it will happen by her 20s.

Scenes from a Birthday

This is Mariel before heading to Shining Rivers for her birthday.  She was quite excited about her outfit for her birthday: Striped dress (white and hot pink), polka dot tights (purples), puzzle rain boots (every color imaginable), and her pink windbreaker. 

She then insisted on taking MY picture, because I have taken her "Shining Rivers picture" many times while she stands in front of the door.  So, this is what I looked like on her birthday for our trip to school.  Unlike her, I am the same height on the first day we went to Shining Rivers over a year and half ago as I am today.

Birthdays are a BIG DEAL at Shining Rivers.  The teachers set up a circle, do a special song and story, and there are candles lit and a (parent written) tale for every year of the childs life.  It is a very sweet, touching celebration.  The rainbow chair just to the right has been Mariel's this year, so it was set in the place of honor.  Her teacher, Michiyo, made her a special play crown as a gift and I made some oatmeal cookies to bring in for a treat. 

It was a beautiful day and the class got to spend some time outside- this is them contemplating a robin that flew down and was hanging out in the "meadow."  After that I took Mariel to her new preschool and she got a second celebration (with store bought cookies this time).  Of course, I forgot my camera!

While she was at school I worked on the garden (it was 70 degrees out!) and put together celebration number 3 for the day.  She had lots of presents - she loved ALL of them!- and a new set of fairy princess sheets for her bed.  We had macaroni and cheese and sausage for dinner, and then chocolate cupcakes with pink frosting.  She was a pretty happy girl!